While a marriage is a legal binding between two people to ensure respect, trust, and complete transparency, sometimes the rules of a marriage can go out of the window.
Unfortunately, husbands (and wives) aren’t always totally honest in a marriage when it comes to their finances.
Whether your husband might have a secret bank account to surprise you with savings for a vacation or if he is deliberately keeping his financial decisions away from you for darker reasons, you might never know.
Here is how to find out if your husband has a secret bank account.
The best way to find out if your husband has a secret bank account is to look for physical evidence. This includes checking mail and ATM receipts to see if there is a correlation of him using the same bank account that you are unaware of.
If the last four digits of his card number are different to your shared account, there’s a chance this could be a secret bank account.
Also, if your husband suddenly appears with new gifts and purchases, keep an eye on your joint account. This is probably the easiest way to see if he has a secret bank account, because you would see the transactions from the account(s) you already know of.
Most things can be concealed online better than in real life. If your husband has a secret bank account, he could have made separate emails for that account which means only he has access to it.
Here’s where it gets tricky – you shouldn’t have to look through your husband’s phone or computer to see if he’s being financially unfaithful. In fact, it’s potentially illegal to hack into your husband’s email without his consent.
The best way to check online evidence of a secret bank account is to check the browser history. If the website of a bank you don’t have ties with keeps coming up, this could be a sign of a secret bank account.
This seems like a fairly obvious one, but keep an eye out for any strange behavior. If your husband has a secret bank account, he could be distancing himself from you more. He could go quiet when money is discussed, or he could become angry or defensive.
However, suspicious behavior changes could be a sign of something else, so don’t automatically come to the conclusion that he has a secret bank account from this evidence alone.
If you have discussed a divorce with your husband and decide to go forward with divorce proceedings, you will have the right to subpoena your husband’s finances.
This includes bank accounts, tax returns, and paychecks. This is probably the best way to find out if your husband has a secret bank account.
It can be tricky, as any accounts owned by either of the people involved in the marriage will be considered marital property. However, this means that whatever secret account your spouse has means that it’s technically yours, too.
When looking at tax returns in divorce proceedings, make sure to look for interest or dividends from the bank account. Other evidence such as cancelled checks and pay stubs will also provide evidence of the bank account the money has come from/is going to.
If it’s a different bank account to what you know, then this could be a sign of a secret bank account.
During the court proceedings, you are allowed to depose your husband about any secret bank accounts. Under oath, he is legally obligated to tell you the truth.
Sure, you don’t want to jump to divorce proceedings immediately if you have suspicions of a secret bank account, but this is possibly the best way to get the answer if you are planning a divorce anyway.
Not only is it highly unethical and morally wrong to hide money from your spouse, but it is also illegal.
Anything owned by the people in a marriage becomes marital property – including secret bank accounts. This is known as financial infidelity, and it can be detrimental to a marriage.
Money is a complicated and sensitive topic in any relationship – especially a marriage. Part of the marriage vows includes a promise to love and be with one another “for richer or poorer”, so owning a secret account is a betrayal of that promise.
If you unfortunately find enough evidence to prove that your husband has a secret bank account, there is a way to recover from this without going to court. You should seek the help from financial marriage counseling first.
The professional therapist will help to make the conversation about finances easier, and will also help to mediate a potentially upsetting and agitated discussion.